This world can be a hard place, and life can be challenging. But being able to have a bit of silliness mixed in can do a lot of good.
Embracing My Inner Silliness
One of those things that I have learned as I have continued my healing journey is learning more about who I am as a person. As a teenager I became chronically ill and while I was in college, I started dating my abusive ex-husband. I never really got a chance to discover who I was as a young adult. Everything was always very serious in my brain, and I don’t really remember just being silly once I became a teenager.
I have heard from many of my friends and family members that they can see a noticeable change in me since I left my ex-husband. I always smiled, but I didn’t realize that the smile wasn’t really real. People have told me that I am noticeably happier and in comparison photos I can 100% see it. One of my friends also told me that I laugh a lot more. When they told me this, it made me think about how I was trying to embrace silliness. I joke more, laugh more, and enjoy being goofy. It is important to try not to worry so much about what other people think. Life is too short to not be your true self and enjoy it.
Things Don’t Have to Be Serious All The Time
There are so many things that we have to be serious about. Our future, money, health, mental recovery from trauma, etc. These heavy things take up a lot of space. And a lot of weight. It is important that we have moments where we are serious and think about these things. There are things that we have to work hard on and for. But here is the thing. Not everything needs to always be about growth and reflection and processing. Our brains need time to recuperate. Time to just be ourselves. Time to have fun.
My Fun Example of Not Being Serious
One of those moments of silliness for me was being flirtatious with a guy that I thought was cute. This first step for me back into “the dating world” didn’t need to be serious. I was not ready for a relationship. But this was something fun. Something new for me. Something spontaneous and I felt silly. It gave me the butterflies and I talked with people about how cute he was. I specifically chose who I talked to about this experience. Why? Because it wasn’t serious, and I wanted it to remain that way. Certain people are in your life to help you with growth and processing. Others are there to enjoy having fun alongside you (and some can be both of those things). That is what I needed out of this experience. I didn’t need to consider the depths of the hard emotions of considering dating again. Nor did I need to make a real plan of trying to date this guy. I just needed to enjoy the butterflies.
Making Time for Fun and Silliness
It is also important to make time for those things that are fun. Doing things for yourself just because they are fun. These are not the things that you have to do (even if you find those fun too). They are not household chores, errands, appointments, family gatherings, doing things for others, work related, etc. These are the things you do just because you enjoy them and don’t need to think about them being anything more. That might be:
- Playing a video game
- Pleasure reading
- Taking a leisurely walk,
- Dancing like no one is watching,
- Doing puzzles
- Making art.
- Etc.
Whatever you do, make sure that you are making time for you and time for a bit of silliness along the way.
