The month of July is Disability Awareness month. One of the pieces of my journey in life is the fact that I am disabled and I have been for about 1/2 of my life. In this post today, I want to share about my disability and how I have learned and owned that even though I am disabled, I am also capable.
How I First Became Disabled
I have had quite the journey as it has come to my disability. It all started when I was in high school and broke my hand while playing softball. My hand just never quite healed properly and I was in a ton of pain all of the time. After visiting several specialists, I learned that I had CRPS/RSD. Complex Regional Pain Syndrome is known for being one of the most painful conditions in existence. Your brain and nerves make your body feel like it is on fire and that something as light as a feather feels like a stabbing knife. My condition spread from my hand around my body to where it affected both of my hands, both feet, my spinal column, and brain. It took about 3 years, but I got this to a manageable place, up until 2017, when I regressed and couldn’t walk again due to the pain. Thankfully I navigated and got back to a manageable place at the start of 2020.
My Current Disability Diagnoses
Then here I was in 2022, starting to have new symptoms. These symptoms did not match my previous diagnosis, so I did not feel that it was a simple regression. I wasn’t having pain, but couldn’t walk properly. Then I reached a point where I couldn’t independently move my legs below my hips. Now I walk with my hips and use a wheelchair for longer distances. I was recently diagnosed with Functional Neurological Disorder.
Here we are now. Once again I am experiencing new symptoms that seem to be separate from my functional neurological disorder and my recent concussion. I am having severe pain in my side, lower back, and abdomen. In addition I am having weird random symptoms: headaches, nausea, weight loss, dizziness spells, rash, etc. I am facing such a gigantic amount of doctors and therapists. All on the journey to a diagnosis.
Disabled Doesn’t Equal Incapable
Yes, I am disabled. It does not bother me to share that this is the case. It is not embarrassing. The fact that I have one does not mean that I am lazy or not trying hard enough. Trust me when I say that I am doing everything I can to best manage all of my diagnoses. However, no matter how hard I try, I am going to have struggles. I am going to have to adapt. Adapting isn’t a negative thing. Adapting is how you overcome your circumstances and still find ways that you can enjoy your life and accept who you are.
Despite the fact that I am disabled, I am still capable of doing many things with adaptations and tools. Utilizing a wheelchair and walker gives me more independence. A disability placard gives me the ability to go out in public and do things without tiring as fast. Grabbers help me to reach things without having to bend over. I may not always need to use these tools or adaptations, but for the time being, they give me what I need to be successful and capable.
In Conclusion
If you are disabled, there is still so much life out there for you to lead. Whether you have ADHD, are autistic, blind, deaf, have a physical disability, etc. There are adaptive sports teams, there are remote work options, and lots of delivery services. There are many tools out there that can be utilized. I completely understand that everyone’s journey is different and that how successful you are depends greatly on your support network. Support is everything, be it from family, friends, work, etc. I am very fortunate to have been able to build a great support network. It will not always be easy, often it will be very hard. But even then, you are strong and you are capable. So am I!
